The end of the dream

[skyring]

Yesterday Kerri and I had some frank discussions about my priorities in life and the result is that I've cancelled my October trip, which I must admit was kind of escalating beyond any sort of budget.

I like travel and my internet community, Kerri has her head screwed on a bit tighter and takes an interest in finance, and we've managed to get along fine so far.

But my number one priority is Kerri, and I have to admit I've kind of taken my eye off the ball recently. Doing extra shifts to pay for a month-long holiday merely means I'm spending even less time with her.

It hasn't quite come to a choice between marriage and world travel, but in the end there's only one realistic direction for me, and two round the world trips in a year, not to mention the New Zealand experience, is probably a little too much.

A pity, as I had planned a fantastic holiday based around a road trip through the South, ending up with a day in San Francisco after the convention, but I guess I have to be realistic.

I'm sorry for those people I've let down through this decision, but I'm even sorrier for myself. All told, I've made a right cock-up of this.

But in a way it's a relief. I was beginning to feel like I was being torn apart by conflicting demands on my limited time.

We've compromised. Next April Kerri and I will travel together to the Amsterdam convention.

Comments

[teotakuu.livejournal.com]

Isn't it awful when real life intrudes into one's fantasies?

Seriously, I am sure you are feeling deflated with having to cancel and I am equally sure that the Kansas City BookCrossers will be saddened by your absence but your bond and partnership with Kerri is more important than anything else.

If I may be allowed, I send cheering-up hugs and supportive and comforting thoughts. You are indubitably one of the nicest men on the planet!

[skyring.livejournal.com]

Oh, Otakuu! You are too kind.

Yes, that's it in a nutshell - Kerri is more important to me than anything else.

I should jump straight on a plane and come across to give you a big hug!

But, on second thoughts, you'll have to make do with one of those unsatisfying cyber *hugs* until I can see you again.

[teotakuu.livejournal.com]

Well, a real life hug would be lovely but jumping on planes is what has caused this small life crisis so probably not wise!!

I am the last person, the very, very last person to give sage financial management advice but recent experience with the cost of airline tickets has lent me some small insight into your problem.

Have a lovely Fathers' Day, dear friend

[greedyreader.livejournal.com]

I am sure you haven't let anyone down. And a trip to Amsterdam with your lovely wife sounds like a great solution!

[shendoah.livejournal.com]

I'll echo Otakuu since I can't say it more beautifully than that.

[tzurriz.livejournal.com]

You made the right decision. We'll see you some other time, no worries. Nice to know someone is making sure you keep your head on straight.

[skyring.livejournal.com]

Oh, Tzurriz! I'm such a sook. I'm crying now, just a bit, because I soooo much wanted to see you and your family again. I haven't seen A at all, and M must be growing up so fast.

I'm going to see if I can talk Kerri into coming back via America and Chicago.

[tzurriz.livejournal.com]

Well, here is a video of Miriam on her rocking horse http://www.flickr.com/photos/jfroebe/3889296309/ and there are two other videos, one of her on a swing, and the other is eating pie.

Just a bit to tide you over. I'll get Jason to take some Asher video too.

Don't cry. Hug your wife, and remember what is important.

[skyring.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Tzurriz! You know how to make me smile!

She's such a sweetie!

[madame-urushiol.livejournal.com]

Good on you. There've been some discussions very like that going on in this house recently, so I have some idea where you're coming from. Don't worry about who's disappointed--you just do what's right for you and your family, and let them think about traveling to see YOU sometime. ;)

[mojosmom.livejournal.com]

It's so much better that you two have talked this out and come to a compromise, than that it be left hanging between you. Of course, Kerri comes first!

I'm sorry I won't see you in Chicago, but now I have all the more reason to come to Amsterdam (to meet Kerri, of course!). ;-))

[asterapallas.livejournal.com]

*HUGS*

Please do not be too hard on yourself... my heart just breaks for it.
:(

Kerri loves you for who you are--and so do we.

<3

[lyzzybee.livejournal.com]

Good call, although I can understand it's upsetting to miss the trip.

It's good to have our own interests, but sometimes it must make it harder within the partnership than for those folk who do everything together. I'm glad we're loved enough that they care! Had a similar but less dramatic issue ourselves a year or so back, I pulled back from some of the local group organising and frenetic releasing, and was in the end glad that M had said something rather than suffering in silence/resenting.

Maybe see you in Amsterdam!

[sirroy.livejournal.com]

Unlucky, my friend. But frankly I am surprised you have got away with it thus far.

tee hee

[newkaligula.livejournal.com]

well said. So pete isn't superman after all? Nor Kerri superwoman?

sad and happy for you at the same time Pete

[reggiesgirl2.livejournal.com]

Tony has expressed exactly what I was thinking. :)

Ah well, you have Amsterdam to look forward to and so does Kerrie so it's a win/win situation.

[aka-phoenix.livejournal.com]

I'll just stick to the positive bits: I love that you and Kerri talked it over instead of letting it simmer. I'm also very glad to hear you did what seems to be the right thing for your marriage, your wife and therefore, for yourself. And last but not least, not only can I look forward to meeting you in Amsterdam, but Kerri as well :)

[elhamisabel.livejournal.com]

Don't worry, there will be other times. Also, travelling with Kerri must be more fun than 5 times on your own, don't you agree?!

[skyring.livejournal.com]

It's always nice to have a travelling companion. However, Kerri's style of travel doesn't quite mesh with my madcap itineraries and I must perforce take the shorter route.

[elhamisabel.livejournal.com]

I think hers is the sensible one in any case. ;-)

[sainity.livejournal.com]

To me, it sounds like you're also preserving your sanity. Doing that many shifts and seeing so little of your family would likely take a toll on yourself, as well, not just your family. :) And a trip is always more enjoyable when you've the energy to make the most of it!

[wombles.livejournal.com]

I can understand this, so much more then you may realise actually!