Friends

[skyring]

I unfriended tiggysbabes today. I don't feel real good about this, because I try to friend anybody who friends me, but I cannot honestly say that I am interested in page after page of the doings of small folk. I appreciate the love and effort that goes into the journal, but it's not quite my cup of tea.

Which leads me to wonder what journals I really like. Mutual interests, of course, such as Bookcrossing. Or writing. or travel.

Witty journals. Journals that make me smile or think.

Emotional journals. Journals that make me feel for the writer, share their triumphs and tragedies.

Journals of people I know.

I can put up with a certain amount of things that bore the socks off me, such as knitting or fast cars or horses, but there's got to be something to keep me interested.

I probably should look at my Bookcrossing friends list as well. Bookcrossing doesn't seem to do much with this information. In LJ it's crucial, because I get a great deal of pleasure from reading the journals of my friends, but in BX, it doesn't really matter if someone's a friend or not. It's really just a link to bookshelves, and I tend to go to my own and edit the URL, changing Skyring to Friendsname, if I want to look at their bookshelf.

Comments

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

No offence taken, my lj used to have my thoughts & goals & dreams in, but the PND & sheer amount of time it takes to look after 2 young children cuts into all that.

My lj will soon be back to "normal" but at the moment, it's really just what I do day to day as a stay at home parent.

I'd have liked to have met you when you came to London & enjoy reading about your exploits :)

[skyring.livejournal.com]

I used to be a stay at home parent of two young children, and I can understand how their lives are so intimately bound up with yours. One of the joys of being a parent was walking down the street with a chubby little hand clutched in mine. Occasionally we'd both skip.

But they are teenagers now, and though I love them both dearly, we no longer skip along city streets. Too old and dignified.

As to London, I'm stealing time from my other duties to write the story of my Monopoly adventure. If I do a chapter a day it will be done in no time at all!

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

The monopoly idea was excellent & I enjoyed reading about your trips around London to release the books :)

I'm releasing 37 books to celebrate my 37th birthday next week, but did cheat & took 7 of them to a meet. That's still 32 wild releases though :)

And, yes, my life is 95% parent & 5% me. Of course I love it or I wouldn't do it, but I know it's temporary, so my sanity just about stays :)

[thebiblioholic.livejournal.com]

In LJ my "friends" are the journals I am interested in reading. In bookcrossing, my friends are the people I have met "in the flesh".

A friend by any other name..

[martip.livejournal.com]

It might be nice if the list were called something besides "friends". "Journals Of Interest", or "Journals I Follow", maybe? Ah, well, even tiggysbabes seems to know what you mean.

Marti, who cannot read the journal of *everyone* she finds a nice person. Simply not do-able.

Re: A friend by any other name..

[antof9.livejournal.com]

I totally agree (and have said so before). If they weren't called "friends", then "un-friending" wouldn't seem so harsh :)

And I couldn't remember who it was who said they used the BX friends list for people they've met in real life, so I'm glad to give thebiblioholic credit. I've been thinking of doing that lately too!

Re: A friend by any other name..

[shendoah.livejournal.com]

Then you have the "journal I no longer find interesting." :D Ouch.

Interests

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

It's not harsh if both people are adults & can understand that we're all different & want to read about different things. Unfortunately, that's not always the case.
My lj is "just me" too. It's not embellished or flowered up, so I honestly don't take offence if someone doesn't want to read about my children, my new house or my new cats.
I might possibly be a bit upset if someone said my creative writing or poetry or somesuch wasn't intersing. I don't know.

Re: A friend by any other name..

[antof9.livejournal.com]

ouch is right :)

it could be "the journal that is too emotionally heavy for me to read" or "the journal where the entries are too long and I have ADD" or one I almost used once "the journal where one of the icons has the F word in it very clearly and in big block letters and I don't want someone at work to see that when I'm merrily scrolling through my friends page"!

Re: A friend by any other name..

[tiggsybabes.livejournal.com]

I know it's the "un-friending" that can be taken the wrong way.
I do think that it would be less harsh if lj re-named that part of it.
I also have a filter & on v busy days & after holidays where I have no net access, I only read the ljs of my actual rl friends just so I don't miss anything important happening to someone I actually know.
Gosh, this isn't sounding right, but I hope you can follow what I mean!

[bookczuk.livejournal.com]

I've "unfriended" a person or two...but have hated the way the term sounds...so cruel.

There are some people who I tend to gloss over...and others I tend to zero in on.

Now, at least I don't feel so guilty, and don't feel bad if someone chooses to unfriend me. (But if you knock me off your list, you're dead meat!)

I like the use of the BC friends list for people you have met in person....but I haven't had the good fortune of you world travelers to meet so many folks!

But it's an idea to keep in mind.....

[alicefanclub.livejournal.com]

I've looked at my friend's list several times and considered doing just that with a few people. You know what stops me? I've taken a couple people off and they haven't reciprocated, which makes my numbers uneven. Because of my OCD, this drives me crazy. I would like the number to be exact, and I can't get it that way without emailing them and asking them to take me off, which seems mean. :) Of course, they can't read my friends-only stuff without being on mine, anyway, but still.

As for the friend list in BX, I haven't used or looked at that thing in at least a year. I forgot its there. I initially used it for people I did trades with, or people who I had struck up interesting correspondence with. But I've no idea who's on there now.

[semioticghosts.livejournal.com]

I have a limited flist whose journals I read pretty much daily, and an expanded flist on a different filter, whose stuff I read when I have time.

I think all of us write for an audience, and the content of the journal depends not just on our need for expression but also on the perceived interestes of our audience. I certainly wouldn;t take offence whne somebody decided that they didn't quite want to follow my ramblings, but get all excited about the occasionla comment along the lines of 'more of this, please'.

[texaswren.livejournal.com]

How do you know if someone has unfriended you?

I almost never remember to go to my lj friends list. I just did and saw that some people had friended me--I have no idea when. I checked them so that they are on my friends list now.
Someone remind me now and then to check that out.